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I Needed to Use Your Car

Pain Relief
Misc Jokes
Submitted by nerdasaurus

Every time I get a headache I take 2 Ibuprofen and keep away from my children...

Just like the bottle says.

I Needed to Use Your Car
Family Jokes
Submitted by merk

After shopping for most of the day, a couple returns to find their car has been stolen. They go to the police station to make a full report. Then, a detective drives them back to the parking lot to see if any evidence can be found at the scene of the crime. To their amazement, the car has been returned.

There is an envelope on the windshield with a note of apology and two tickets to a music concert. The note reads, "I apologize for taking your car, but my wife was having a baby and I had to hot-wire your ignition to rush her to the hospital. Please forgive the inconvenience. Here are two tickets for tonight's concert of Garth Brooks, the country-and-western music star."

Their faith in humanity restored, the couple attend the concert and return home late. They find their house has been robbed. Valuable goods have been taken from throughout the house. And, there is a note on the door reading, "Well, you still have your car. I have to put my newly born kid through college."

[CyberJoke3000] December 12, 2023

It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™

Popular Science announces its fifty best innovations of 2023.
https://www.popsci.com/technology/best-of-whats-new-2023/

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Today's CyberJoke 3000™

Our son was born on December 24. When we arrived home from the hospital with him, our four-year-old daughter enthusiastically greeted our visitors with: "Come in! Come in and see the newborn king!"

What do you see when Mrs. Santa wears her tight yoga pants? A mistletoe!

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