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One Way Trip to Mars

Nipped In the Bud
Puns
Submitted by Gary Greenfield

I saw a coupon for a discount on a vasectomy.

I clipped it.

One Way Trip to Mars
Lawyer Jokes
Submitted by merk

NASA was interviewing professionals to be sent to Mars. Only one could go, and he couldn't return to Earth.

The first applicant, an engineer, was asked how much he wanted to be paid for going. "A million dollars," he answered, "because I want to donate it to M.I.T."

The next applicant, a doctor, was asked the same question. He asked for two million dollars. "I want to give a million to my family," he explained, "and leave the other million for the advancement of medical research."

The last applicant was a lawyer. When asked how much money he wanted, he whispered in the interviewer's ear, "Three million dollars."

"Why so much more than the others?" the interviewer asked.

The lawyer replied, "If you give me $3 million, I'll give you $1 million, I'll keep $1 million, and we'll send the engineer."

[CyberJoke3000] December 28, 2023

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Today's CyberJoke 3000™

After a lengthy conference with her estranged husband, her lawyer reported, "Mrs. LaMay, I've made a settlement with your husband that is eminently fair to both of you." "Fair to both?!?" Mrs. LaMay exploded. "I could have done that myself! Why did I hire a lawyer?"

What does a woman get once a month that lasts about a week? Her husband's paycheck!

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