الاثنين، 26 فبراير 2024

Really, Still?

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Ineffective Pain Pills
One Liner Jokes
Submitted by Skippy

"Evidently, my pain pills are not working."

"Why do you say that?"

"Well, you're still here."

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Really, Still?
Misc Jokes
Submitted by Harry Finkelstein

After waiting more than an hour and a half for her date, Sarah decided she had been stood up.

Exasperated, she changed from her dinner dress into pajamas and slippers, fixed some popcorn and hot chocolate, and resigned herself to an evening of TV.

No sooner had she flopped down in front of the TV when the doorbell rang. Her dad went to the door, and there stood her date.

He took one look at Sarah on the couch and gasped, "I'm two hours late and she's still not ready?"

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[CyberJoke3000] February 26, 2024

It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™

In honor of Leap Year, here are some new sight gags!
http://allowe.com/humor/sight-gags.html?PicNumber=9301

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Today's CyberJoke 3000™

Dear Tide: I've used your excellent product all of my married life. Now that I am in my fifties, I find it even better! Last month, I spilled some red wine on my new white blouse. My inconsiderate and uncaring husband belittled me about being clumsy and a pain in the ass. Well, one thing led to another, and somehow his blood ended up on my new white blouse! I grabbed the Tide and, to my surprise, the stains came out. So well, in fact, the detectives tell me the DNA tests on my blouse are negative and I'm no longer a suspect. Going through menopause is bad enough without a murder rap to worry about! Again, thank you for such a great product. PS. Do you know the address of the Hefty bag people?

Boyfriend: "I named my dog after you." Girlfriend: "Aww. Because it's so cute?" Boyfriend: "No. Because it's a bitch!"


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