Problems with the Bed

Use Less Gas Marriage Jokes Submitted by Adie Peter My wife said to me, "How on earth are we going to use 9% less gas this winter?" "You can stop burning my dinner for a start," I replied.

Problems with the Bed Doctor Jokes Submitted by srinu Shakey went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I've got trouble. Every time I get into bed, I think there's somebody under it. I get under the bed, I think there's somebody on top of it. Top, under, top, under. You gotta help me, I'm going crazy!" "Let me take care of it," said the shrink. "Come to me three times a week, and I'll cure your fears." "How much do you charge?" "A hundred dollars per visit." "I'll sleep on it," said Shakey. Six months later the doctor met Shakey on the street. "Why didn't you ever come to see me again?" asked the psychiatrist. "For a hundred bucks a visit? A bartender cured me for ten dollars." "Is that so! How?" "He told me to cut the legs off the bed!"

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[CyberJoke3000] October 30, 2024

It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™

The Digital Millennium Copyright Act was supposed to keep music from being copied but manufacturers have made it their own: everything from tractors to soft ice cream dispensers refuse to allow themselves to be repaired -- except by their own company. But the Copyright Office has cracked one of them: ice cream is now free to flow again!
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Today's CyberJoke 3000™

A homeless man spied a banker leaving his office. "How about a buck for a cup of coffee?" The banker said, "Here's five bucks. Just don't bug me again." The next day, as the same banker was leaving the same office, the same tramp punched him in the nose. "Ow!" yelled the banker, "is that how you thank me for giving you five dollars yesterday?" The homeless man snarled back, "Those damned five cups of coffee kept me awake all night!"

My wife suggested we change positions in bed so I sat up and told her I had a headache!

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