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Fractured Dictionary, Part II

Once for Yes
Sport Jokes
Submitted by srg

Standing on the sidelines, during a game being played by my school's football team, I saw one of the players take a hard hit. He tumbled to the ground and didn't move.

We grabbed our first-aid gear and rushed out onto the field. The coach picked up the young man's hand and urged, "Son, can you hear me? Squeeze once for yes and twice for no."

Fractured Dictionary, Part II
One Liner Jokes
Submitted by Harry Finkelstein

Baloney \ba-lo'-ne\: Where some hemlines fall.

Banquet \bang'-kwit\: Why the vocalist had no instrumentalists.

Bernadette \burn'-a-det\: The act of torching a mortgage.

Boomerang \boo'-me-rang\: What's on top of the Ghost Cream Pie.

[CyberJoke3000] May 7, 2024

It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™

Two hundred years ago today was the premiere of Beethoven's Ninth Symphony, one of masterpieces of orchestra literature. Today, you can follow the score as Herbert von Karjan conducts the Berlin Philharmonic in a 1977 performance.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ixpfgm_xxSE

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Today's CyberJoke 3000™

Before opening the refrigerator door, I always knock... just in case there's a salad dressing.

What do you call money that grows on trees? Marijuana.

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