الأربعاء، 26 يونيو 2024

Limits on Giving

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Doing Nothing
Relationship Jokes
Submitted by Dan the Man 009

Wife: Whatcha doing?

Me: Nothing.

Wife: You did that yesterday.

Me: I wasn't finished.

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Limits on Giving
Money Jokes
Submitted by maryjones

"You know, I think everyone should divide their worldly goods with the other fellow," said an office worker to another.

"That's a good idea. If you had two thousand dollars would you give me half?"

"Sure."

"And if you had two automobiles, would you give me one?"

"Sure."

"And if you had two shirts, would you give me one?"

"No."

"No? Why?"

"Because I have two shirts."

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[CyberJoke3000] June 26, 2024

It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™

Ken Shirriff wondered how throw-away subway tickets can control a computer. There's a chip about the size of a grain of salt. Look at it! He has great micro-photos, too.
https://www.righto.com/2024/06/montreal-mifare-ultralight-nfc.html

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Today's CyberJoke 3000™

Little Suzi helped Mother set the table for company. After their guests arrived and were seated, Mother noticed something was missing. "Susan, you forgot to put a knife and fork at the minister's place." Little Suzi said, "I didn't think he needed them; Daddy says he eats like a pig!"

Bill and Ed were enjoying a round of golf when a sudden bolt of lightning killed them both. At heaven's gate, St. Peter asked their names and began perusing a long list. He finally looked up and said, "There's been a terrible mistake. Neither of you is due here for many years. I'll send you right back." Ed said, "Oh, no. Don't. Our families have already mourned our passing and that would upset them even more. Could we go back as different people?" St. Peter thought a moment and then said, "What do you have in mind?" Bill said, "We could return as two lesbians." "Why?" asked St. Peter. "Because then we could still eat pussy and play from the women's tees!"


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