الأربعاء، 4 سبتمبر 2024

Waiting Room Conversations

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A Vegan and A Programmer
Computer Jokes
Submitted by Gegg Smith

What's the difference between a vegan and a computer programmer?

One is disgusted by a rack of lamb and the other is disgusted by a lack of RAM.

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Waiting Room Conversations
Doctor Jokes
Submitted by Ambergypsy

A man goes to the doctor and sits in the waiting room. A lady shuffles out from the doctor's door and sits next to him, waiting for her follow-up appointment. A bandage is wrapped around her head. "Gee, what happened to you?" the man asks.

She says, "I've got earosis and the doctor had to cut off my ear."

Unsettled, the man waits a bit more and another woman shuffles out with her leg fully bandaged. She takes the remaining unoccupied seat next to him. He turns to her, "What happened to you?"

She replied, "Oh, I've got ptomaine poisoning and the doctor had to cut off my toe."

The man is fully upset and walks out of the office as the receptionist calls out: "Mr. Jones, the doctor will see you for your asthma!"

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[CyberJoke3000] September 4, 2024

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Today's CyberJoke 3000™

"Rabbi, please explain the Talmud to me." "Very well. But, first, a question: If two men climb up a chimney and one comes out clean and one comes out dirty, which man will wash himself?" "The dirty one." "No. The two men look at each other and the dirty man thinks he is clean and the clean man thinks he is dirty, therefore, the clean man washes himself. Now, a second question: If two men climb up a chimney and one comes out dirty and one comes out clean, which man will wash himself?" "That's easy, Rabbi. You just told me. The man who is clean washes himself because he thinks he is dirty." "No. If they each look at themselves, the clean man knows he doesn't need to wash, so the dirty man washes himself. Now, a third question: If two men climb up a chimney and one comes out dirty and one comes out clean, which man will wash himself?" "Now I don't know, Rabbi. It depends on your point of view. It could be either one." "No. If two men climb up a chimney, how could one man remain clean? They both are dirty and they both wash themselves." "Rabbi, you asked me the same question three times and then gave me three different answers. Is this some kind of a joke?" "No, son. This is the Talmud."

Two hot Swedish maidens were having their picture taken. One asked, "Why is he lookin' at us like that?" The other replied, "He's got to focus." The first one said, "Oh, no! You tell him he's got to take the picture first!"


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